Revenge of the Homecoming Queen Read online

  I start my normal bounce down the stairs, then suddenly feel light-headed. Maybe I’m not feeling as great as I thought. I slow my pace and eventually reach the bottom of the stairs to see my parents gathered at the kitchen table with an guy dressed in blue slacks and a white oxford. I was expecting a Benjamin McKenzie look-a-like looking hot decked out in uniform, but this guy is tall, lanky, extremely hairy and wouldn’t look hot in anything. The scary thing is that I know this even though he has a long-sleeved shirt on. Thick black hair is escaping from the cuffs of his sleeves, the neck of his shirt, and even from his nostrils. He holds his hand out for me to shake, and it is only the fear of being arrested that makes me touch him even for a millisecond.

  “Hi, Aspen, I’m Detective Malone. I’m just here to ask you a few questions about Angel Ives. Can you tell me about the last time you saw Angel?” He asks, immediately starting a barrage of questions.

  I move over to an empty seat and settle myself trying to stop my head from spinning. I think my body needs more sustenance than soup. Maybe Mom will make me a cheese toastie when this hairy guy leaves.

  “Aspen, honey, he asked you when you last saw Angel?” My mom interrupts after I’ve waited too long to answer. “You’ll have to forgive her, Harry. She’s had a rough night.”

  Ha! His name is Harry, that’s classic. I wonder how Mom knows his first name?

  “So I heard. It sounds like you were lucky Mr. Bachrach found you when he did.”

  I smile at him and nod my head yes. He’s fishing, I can tell by the look in his eyes. I’ve got this gift of having a sixth sense about people. He probably thinks this is going to be the big break that bumps him up to sergeant. He’ll be so disappointed when Angel returns home with her hands full of shopping bags.

  “Your father and I went to high school with Harry … uh, Detective Malone.” Mom babbles nervously. The detective nods his head and smiles.

  “Oh, yeah. Your parents and I go way back.” He throws his head back, laughing.

  “Hey, now. It hasn’t been that long,” Dad jokes.

  “I can’t believe you guys have a daughter old enough to be a senior. Man, I feel old. Here’s my family.” He whips out a wallet and shows us a picture of him surrounded by a tall, beautiful blonde and three tiny versions of her. How in the world did this guy snag a hottie? If he wasn’t in the picture I would have sworn he was lying and that this was the picture that came with the wallet when he bought it.

  “They are so beautiful, Harry,” Mom coos.

  The detective turns to me and asks, “Can you believe I used to be in love with your dad’s girlfriend?” He laughs hysterically.

  “Mom?” I ask with a twinge of horror in my voice.

  The three of them get a good chuckle out of this. Mom composes herself first and answers. “No, sweetie. It was a girl Dad dated before me.”

  I was gonna say. As if my mom would ever give this guy the time of day.

  “Wow, Harry,” Dad pipes up, “I forgot all about that. Did you guys ever get together?”

  “Nah, I was too shy to approach her. Thankfully I grew out of that.” He says tapping the picture of his wife.

  Okay, I already know way too much information about this guy. I decide to interrupt their little trip down memory lane. “So, you’re here about Angel?”

  They all look guilty remembering that this isn’t a social call. The detective quickly slips back into his stern I’m-all-business mode.

  “Yes, Aspen. When was the last time you saw her?”

  “The last time I saw Angel was at the bonfire. She’s a Seagal and she was cheering. A few minutes later, I saw her heading toward the school with Lucas Riley. I was on my way to find them when I had my attack.”

  “Why do you think they were headed towards the school? Everybody else went to the football field for doughnuts and hot chocolate, right?” He pulls out a tiny spiral notebook from his front pocket and starts jotting down notes.

  “I have no idea what they were doing. That’s what I was going to find out.”

  “Do you normally stalk people?” He gives me a challenging look. I don’t like this guy. He’s trying to get a rise out of me, and it’s working. I’m just going to give it to him straight.

  “Only when they’re trying to steal my boyfriend.”

  “Lucas Riley is your boyfriend?” He looks genuinely surprised.

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Aspen, honey, let the detective ask the questions,” my dad chimes in nervously.

  “It’s okay, Dan. I was just under the impression that you and Rand Bachrach were kind of an item. I just got done talking to him and it was pretty apparent how much he cares for you … ”

  “Now listen here, Rand and I are so not an item!” I yell, suddenly getting an adrenaline rush. “You make sure and write that down on your little paper. Lucas Riley is my boyfriend, not Rand Bachrach. Seriously, write that down and tell everybody.” Detective Malone just stares at me with his pen paused in midair.

  “Aspen,” my parents both shout in unison. Detective Malone holds up his hand to signal that my outburst is not a problem.

  “Well, miss. I’m afraid I have some bad news for you then. Your boyfriend was the last person to be seen with Ms. Ives, so he is a prime suspect in her disappearance. We don’t have enough to charge him yet, but we will.”

  “This whole thing is so ridiculous. If you knew Angel, you would know that she’s only doing this because she stole my inhaler, and now she’s scared she’s going to get into trouble. The only reason this is a big deal is because her family is richer than Bill Gates.”

  “Do you have proof that she stole your inhaler?” he asks, suddenly very interested in what I have to say again. I explain to him about the cheap lipstick message, the nudie pics, and the slashed tire. He is completely unconvinced that even if Angel was responsible for the aforementioned acts that she would deliberately try to harm me by stealing my inhaler.

  “That’s the point. I’ve never had an attack like that before, she couldn’t have known it would happen.” I hate that in a way I’m defending Angel. I just don’t want homecoming week ruined anymore than it has been because of her. “Can’t you dust my locker for prints or something?” Maybe all those CSI episodes I watched are finally paying off.

  “Even if her prints were there, she goes to your school. They are supposed to be there. Right now we are more concerned with finding Angel safe. Then I can question her about the inhaler.” He answers, rising from the table. I see where I rate. I can’t wait until Angel comes breezing back home, arms full of shopping bags, then I bet Detective Malone will be so pissed at her for wasting his time and blowing his promotion that he’ll take me seriously.

  “Thank you all for your time and if you think of anything else give me a call.” He places a business card on the table.

  “I’ll show him out,” I say, slowly rising from my chair so that I don’t get light-headed again. I walk the detective to the front door, now safely out of my parent’s hearing range.

  “What did Rand say that made you think we were an item?” I ask, opening the front door.

  “He didn’t really say anything, I just thought I detected something more. Obviously I was wrong,” he says, sarcastically, while patting the notebook in his front pocket. What a wise guy!

  “Aspen, if you think of anything else, give me a call.” He turns away from me and walks onto the front porch. Suddenly he turns around and says, “By the way, Rand probably didn’t mention this, but he was the last one to see Lucas and Angel together. From the way Rand described it, Angel had a mouthful of your boyfriend, and it wasn’t his tongue in her mouth. It sounds like maybe you need to get a new boyfriend.” With that he gets into his squad car and drives away while I’m left to pick my chin up off the front porch.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  “We are so broken up!” I scream into the phone. It took me about five seconds to get back to my bedroom and speed dial Lucas’s cell phone after Detective Malone
dropped his little bomb on me. I am so pissed at Lucas right now I think I could kill him. And why the hell didn’t Rand tell me that he saw them together? This is beyond humiliating. Now everybody in school is going to know.

  “Aspen?” a bewildered Lucas asks back.

  “No, it’s freaking Angel. Yes, of course, it’s Aspen. As far as I knew I was still your girlfriend and now I find out from some hairy police detective that Angel was servicing you at the same time that I almost died in the hallway.”

  “Listen, Aspen, I’ve got to keep this line clear. Angel might be trying to call.” And with that he has the colossal balls to hang up on me. I am so done with Lucas Riley. I’ve got to call Tobi and tell her all of this. Oh crap! I keep forgetting. She’s mad at me.

  I suppose I should call and apologize even though I totally didn’t do anything wrong. But I don’t like fighting with Tobi and I need her help because now I’m not going to have a date for the homecoming dance. Which I guess isn’t such a big deal because Tobi doesn’t have a date either. I guess her and I could just go together. That kind of blows since it’s my senior year though. Maybe I should try and seduce Jimmy McAllister since Angel’s “missing.” Nah, it wouldn’t be any fun if Angel couldn’t see me steal him away from her.

  I suppose Rand would trip over his own feet to be my escort. Part of me feels like showing up with Rand just to shock people. But he knew about Lucas and Angel and didn’t tell me. So no way is he getting off that easy. Besides, I’d look like a joke if I showed up at the dance with geeky Rand by my side. I’ve got a reputation to uphold. Even though he’s kind of cute, and funny, and an amazing kisser.

  I knew Tobi was crazy for thinking that Rand had a thing for me. If he did, he would have spilled the beans about Lucas’s BJ to get his foot in the door with me. Instead he didn’t even tell me. The really weird thing about all of this is that I’m more upset that Rand kept a secret from me than I am about Lucas. I thought Rand was so sweet. I mean, we kissed. Doesn’t that automatically make him obligated to disclose any humiliating information he knows about me? Why am I obsessing about King Geek Rand anyway?

  Determined to force all thoughts of Rand and his perfect lips from my mind, I jump off my bed and pull the picture of Lucas and me off my vanity mirror. I carefully rip it in half, throwing the Lucas half in my garbage can and sticking the half of me back on the mirror. Lucas is an idiot. I could get practically any guy in school to go out with me. He’s going to realize what a skank Angel is and come crawling back on his knees. Then I’m going to kick him in the face.

  I still have to convince my parents that I’m well enough to go back to school tomorrow. I put on my best fake smile and join them in the living room. I plop down next to Mom on the couch. Dad is dazed out watching something horribly educational on the History Channel and Mom is busy reading her Oprah magazine. Oprah is the God my mother worships. This gives me an idea.

  “We should go to Chicago sometime, just me and you. We could get tickets to Oprah’s show and go shopping. You know, just do the whole girl thing.”

  “Oprah doesn’t have a talk show anymore,” Mom informs me, looking a bit hurt that I must have forgotten what is surely a painful subject for her. I really need to start paying more attention to other people.

  “Oh, right. I just meant we could go shopping in Chicago.” I answer back, hoping she will still bite. “Actually, I could do some research tomorrow during computer lab and see if there is a tour that goes by her Chicago mansion. I always finish my assignment early, so I’ll have a little time to browse the Web.” My parents are the only people in the free world who don’t own a computer. Of course, I’ve got a laptop and the neighbors have wireless Internet so I connect here all the time but my parents don’t have a clue about that. I wouldn’t even try to explain it. They just totally don’t get anything that doesn’t have wires. They’re still amazed by the remote control and our cordless phone.

  Mom gets a worried look on her face. “I don’t know, Aspen. You gave us a real scare. I think maybe you should rest a little more. Besides, now a girl is missing. That really scares me. What if it would have been you? It’s scary. Her poor parents.” Brilliant, why doesn’t she just hand it to me on a silver platter? I suppose I should feel guilty about using my parent’s naiveté against them, but I just don’t.

  “Yeah, I’ve been thinking about that. You and Dad will both be gone to work and I’ll be here all alone. I think I’d rather be around a bunch of people. I think I’d just feel more comfortable.” I try to look terrified at the thought of being alone.

  Mom looks to Dad, who just shrugs his shoulders, giving Mom permission to make the final call, as usual. She turns back to me, narrows her eyes, and starts jabbing her index finger toward me. Uh-oh. I’ve taken it too far this time.

  “Don’t think I’m not on to you. Because I am. I used to pull this reverse psychology with my parents too. Okay, you can go to school, but if you start feeling bad, you call me immediately. And don’t forget your inhaler and no overdoing it.”

  “I won’t. I promise. Maybe you should write me a note to stay out of gym for a few weeks, too.”

  Mom nods her head in agreement and adds, “And Aspen, I don’t think it’s a good idea if you go around telling people that Angel stole your inhaler. Just keep that to yourself until they find her. Okay?”

  I know that I have to agree or I’ll be locked in my bedroom for the rest of the week. So I nod my head like a good daughter, give her a peck on the cheek, and start to run back upstairs to patch things up with my best friend.

  Mom calls to me when I get halfway up the stairs. I peek my head over the banister, hoping she hasn’t changed her mind.

  “Don’t forget about Oprah’s house,” she says, not even glancing up from her magazine.

  Tobi answers her cell on the third ring. She was probably debating on whether to answer it or not. She must be super-pissed at me. I’m constantly pissing her off. She’s always lecturing me about not appreciating the people in my life and being too self-centered. Hello, I’m the one who almost died and she’s mad at me? But I’m going to be the bigger person and not remind her of that.

  “What do you want?” she answers, obviously still very pissed.

  “Tobi, I’m really sorry. Please forgive me. I should have taken Angel’s disappearance seriously.” I’m actually cringing as I say these words. It’s a good thing I didn’t have to apologize in person or I never could have done it with a straight face. “Have they found her yet?”

  “I just got off the phone with Pippi and no one has heard anything yet. Her family thinks it might be a kidnapping because they’re so rich, but no one’s gotten a ransom note yet.”

  I know I should be focusing on what Tobi is telling me, but I can’t seem to get past the fact that Tobi said she just got off the phone with Pippi. What in the world is she doing cavorting with the enemy? I can’t make an issue of this though or Tobi will go off on me again. I might be self-centered, but I’m not stupid.

  “But why now? I mean Angel’s family has been rich since her great-grandfather made up that Christmas song a million years ago. Why would someone want to kidnap her all these years later?” I delicately try to poke a hole in Tobi’s theory without her realizing it.

  Tobi lets out an exasperated sigh, and then says, “Aspen, I know you think she took off, but I really don’t think she did. Lucas was the last one to see her, and that was when he walked her back to her car in the school parking lot last night.”

  “Oh, he did more than walk her back to her car.” I’m feeling her out to see if she’s already got the lowdown from Pippi.

  “Yeah, I heard about the BJ. Sorry about that.”

  I have to bite back my anger. The total outrage. Tobi was trading gossip about me with Pippi. So far today, I’ve been screwed over by Rand, Lucas, and now Tobi. Who’s next?

  In a dignified tone, I ask, “So everybody knows already, huh?”

  “Yeah, pretty much. But Lucas told eve
rybody he had already broken up with you.”

  “What? He did not and you know it … ”

  “I know. I told Pippi that Lucas did no such thing, so even though Angel is missing, everybody knows that she’s still a boyfriend-stealing ho bag.”

  “Thanks for defending me, Tobi.” I breathe a sigh of relief.

  Too bad the homecoming vote wasn’t this week. I bet I could have swayed the girl vote once they found out Angel seduced my boyfriend while I was nearly dying.

  “Aspen, could you just try to think of someone besides yourself every once in a while?”

  I can’t believe Tobi is talking to me this way. I can tell Pippi’s got her brainwashed so I’m going to have to spend several days deprogramming her. I’m too tired to start right now, so I just agree and offer to pick Tobi up for school tomorrow.

  * * * *

  Rand fixed Cookie up like new. I haven’t gotten over being mad at him, but I do have to admit it was nice that he fixed Cookie. I haven’t talked to him since his visit yesterday. Surprisingly, I really wanted him to call last night. I think I probably just wanted to yell at him for holding out on me about Lucas and Angel.

  I pull up in front of Tobi’s house and she is already waiting on the front porch. Again, she looks like she jumped from the pages of a moderately fashionable magazine. She probably thinks I need cheering up about my breakup with Lucas. What a sweetie!

  “You look adorable,” I tell her once she’s safely in and buckling her seat belt.

  “You have taught me well, Master,” she says in a fake Chinese voice while putting her palms together and bowing her head.

  “I never thought you were actually paying attention.”

  We giggle and it feels good to have lost the friction between us.

  “So who’s going to be your victim for the homecoming dance?” she says playfully, messing with my radio stations.

  “You know I’ve thought about it, and there really isn’t anybody I want to go with. I thought maybe you and I could just hang out together.”